Enchanted Getaway

Thalia, 19. Welcome to my personal writing blog, where everything and nothing is written. Also, there are many musings.

She was relapsing again. This time it was worse; she had friends now, but could not fathom turning to any of them. Isabella was still alone in her heartache. Alone enough to eat next to nothing; not because she cared about her weight, but because she just could not care. Everything reminded her of him - the moon, her friend and her boyfriend, even a song on the radio made her heart hurt.

Isabella kept having the same nightmare about returning to school. Each time, she dreamt that she died because she could not handle going back there. Already having tried to die once in that place, Isabella knew that there was not much of a chance for happiness. 

The one time she had been truly happy was with him. No one else had ever held her while she cried, or made her feel as wonderful as he had.

Then she had lost it all, and had not been the same since. Just a shell who continued to relapse back into her natural, depressed state of mind after another recovery. It was safe there; no one but her own mind could hurt Isabella when she locked herself up.

“When your story is ready for rewrite, cut it to the bone. Get rid of every ounce of excess fat. This is going to hurt; revising a story down to the bare essentials is always a little like murdering children, but it must be done.”

—   Stephen King (via planb-becomeapirate)

(Source: wordpainting, via planb-becomeapirate)

It was getting worse.

She had dreamt about dying again.

She was using her blade again.

How was it supposed to stop?

Nothing was working anymore, and there was no one to turn to.

She was alone.

“You don’t understand an antagonist until you understand why he’s a protagonist in his own version of the world.”

—   John Rogers (via planb-becomeapirate)

(Source: writingquotes, via planb-becomeapirate)

Breakaway masterlist

Title: Breakaway
Rating: T
Pairing:
 Zuko/Katara, Blue Spirit/Katara
Summary: Zuko and Katara used to be best friends. But drama happened, and now they go through high school hating each other. When Zuko saves Katara’s life as the Blue Spirit (more than once, mind you), however, everything as they know it changes. Modern High School AU

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Her heart had fallen, finally. Into the beautiful abyss of failed attempts to fly; to soar above happiness and bliss in a place that had never really existed in the first place.

He’s the one person she could talk to forever.

She was so lonely that she sucked up everyone’s genuine love and care; she constantly complained to them so much that they just couldn’t take it anymore. She was too blind, too lost in her own sorrow to see that it was not just them; it was her, too.

The subject of dying had been on her mind recently. The way it lured her into a false sense of hope, had life failed to work out. A back up plan, if you will.

The amount of time she spent wallowing was unavoidable, unnecessary, unrealistic. She was told that she deserved more than what she gave herself credit for, but she called shenanigans. She had been happy once - existentially so.

But against her will, the devil’s advocate intervened. The epitome of a troll, a rollar coster ride of free-falling chaos and sin. Monsters, evil and dark thoughts, took over her soul in her moment of weakness and she collapsed, giving in to the abyss of misery and dispair.

Nothing could save her now, not even life itself.

The moment of dread was almost here. She knew that it would break her — she was aware of that from the get-go. But instead of getting out when the going was good, she stayed. She stayed because she was actually happy. She wasn’t miserable, crying herself to sleep every night like she knew she would in one days time.

She knew her heart couldn’t take much more of this — of this kind of pining. She absolutely, positively hated it. She’d never been softhearted before he came around. Or possibly, if she was, she pretended it wasn’t real. She’d never acknowledged it before him because that was how she coped.

He’d gotten her to see that reality could be greater than just simply dreaming. Originally, she’d just been a corpse; a zombie in a living body. She’d hadn’t lived, not really. Inadvertently, he had brought out the life in her. The joy, the happiness, the beauty — everything she never even dreamed she could feel.

That’s what he was. He was her reality, her hope for something better that surpassed the unimaginable, but was completely and utterly realistic simultaneously.